Surviving Colchester Zoo’s Trail of Terror! (Spoiler: I Screamed. A Lot.)

So, picture this: you’re in a zoo, it’s dark, you can barely see three feet in front of you, and suddenly — BAM! — some bloke with a chainsaw leaps out of the bushes. Welcome to my night.

I went in expecting a few jump scares and some spooky lighting, but honestly, this event was amazing. It’s not the most highly themed experience I’ve ever done — there aren’t animatronics lurking around every corner or million-dollar set pieces — but what they do have is done really well. The atmosphere, the actors, and that constant sense of “what on earth is about to happen next?” had me on edge (and laughing nervously) the entire time.

Now, the train — oh my days, the train. Normally it’s a calm little journey through animal enclosures, but for this event it’s been completely taken over. Instead of seeing giraffes, you’re suddenly surrounded by movie scenes gone wrong, with actors jumping out from all directions. Just when you think you’re safe sitting on the train — nope! Someone hops onto the train with a chainsaw like it’s the most casual thing in the world. I don’t think I’ve ever gripped a seat that tightly in my life.

There are a few “safe zones” dotted around where you can grab food and drinks — basically a chance to pretend you’re brave again before heading back into the madness. The whole thing feels like one giant, never-ending maze of screams, laughs, and “oh no not again” moments.

If I had to rate it, I’d give it a solid 9/10. My only tiny critique? There were a few quiet stretches without any scares… but honestly, those moments just made the next jump even worse. It’s like they let your guard down on purpose, then boom — another heart attack incoming

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Overall, it was a brilliant night. Loads of fun, loads of screams, and I probably burned more calories from panicked running than an entire gym session. If you get the chance to go — do it. Just maybe bring a spare pair of trousers… you know, just in case. 😅